Someone else is wearing my shoes...

and they are doing the walking for me.

You know the old analogy of your life is like a book and you end one chapter and start another? Well, that is certainly happening to me, but it is more than a new chapter, it is a whole new book. When I stop for a second (which is about all I have these days), and reflect upon my life I start to wonder, holy cow---where did this come from and where is it going? I feel like someone else is wearing my shoes and they are doing the walking for me. Now let me explain----

Back up fifteen years ago....
I am in high school. I am a freshman and have fallen very sick ,very quickly with asthma. Asthma is a seemingly harmless illness that is practically dormant when correctly medicated. My problem is I have never had asthma before. One particular fall day I came down with a nasty virus that lands me in ICU. So, I receive the diagnosis of Viral Asthma and quickly decide I want to be a doctor since I have so much new respect for the profession.

Fast Forward a few years....
I am about to graduate from high school. I am a high achiever and a natural born leader. I have my whole life in front of me. I decide I will go to Texas A&M and be something extraordinary. Perhaps a doctor or maybe a vetranarian. Yeah, that sounds good! Once again, I fall very, very sick (but it is not asthma this time) it is an extremely large ovarian cyst that requires nearly emergency surgery. I decide I no longer want to be a vetrinarian or a doctor I just want to go home and get better.

Fast Forward a few years....
I am about to graduate from college. I have left home (once again) and decided on a school closer to home. I have had many majors up to this point, but decided to graduate with a Psychology degree just to get done. I quickly realize this is a worthless degree without a masters or a PhD. I am about to walk across the stage and have no job, or career for that matter. I decide I will become a teacher for a couple of years and then go back to school and become something extraordinary.

Fast Forward a few more years.....
I am pregnant with Kiera. I have been a teacher for seven years and know there is more on the horizon than what I am currently doing. Principal? Nah, too many angry parents. Counselor? Nah, too many angry kids. One thing becomes very clear...I was meant to be a mom NOT a teacher. I choose to quit and stay home.

Fast Forward many months...
Kiera is already a year old. I love staying home, but know that I cannot/will not stay home forever. I am a planner and not a very patient one. I need a plan...but what?

Now, do you see a theme..........

I have absolutely no idea what I want to be when I grow up. At first, I thought it was a doctor or some sort of profession like that. Then I went through a non-caring-let's-just-get-done-with school sort of phase. After having Kiera, I felt like I needed to figure out who I am and what I will do with my life.

I think I have found my calling professionally, but it feels so strange. It is not at all what I thought it might be. It doesn't need intense schooling and it doesn't line up with my personality strengths. Do you think you know it? I am doing it right now...

Writing.

Seems so simple when I think back... but yet it seems so new and vibrant. It is not at all what I would have guessed I would be thinking about in my thirties. Let me put it this way....

Kids and working in a school are like a tennis shoe to me. They fit. They work. They get the job done. But after awhile they get uncomfortable. You are ready to put something else on. Writing is like a classy pair of heels. At first, they seem too stiff and you can't imagine spending too much time in them. But then you try them on and think, wow these fit nice and I can walk so much better. And I feel good in these sexy shoes. After awhile you find yourself purposely wearing outfits that match your new shoes because you want so much to wear them.

Writing is my classy pair of heels. It makes me feel good. I look forward to figuring out how words work together. I want to catch up with the person wearing my shoes and get them back and put them on and do my own walking. I want to write a book. I love to read, but I love to write even more. That is NOT something I grew up thinking about. I am not even sure where it came from. I do know that my new job opportunity has a lot to do with it! It is time to put up the tennis shoes, and even the lazy days of flip flops, and get out my new classy heels and have some fun in life!

I truly have this blog to thank. I have truly enjoyed putting my seemingly boring life into an story of adventure. I also have you to thank. If I thought I didn't have readers, I may not write. That would be a tragedy. Thank you!